How I searched the Web for a foreign husband

2024 Author: James Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 14:00

Online acquaintance - what could be easier, what could be more romantic, what could be the most exciting and what could be so disappointing …

It seemed to me - it's embarrassing, like newspaper advertisements "A lonely blonde wants to find family happiness with a positive man" … But after hearing the stories of my friends about their girlfriends and about the girlfriends of their girlfriends, I firmly believed that in no more than six months I will definitely marry for the best man in the world.

Yes, I wanted to "ring" with a foreigner. However, walking around international dating sites chilled me. I posted my profile on several marriage sites, which I found in various "tops" of the Internet, but I did not receive any answers in 2 weeks, but regular notifications about site updates began to come. When I decided to check what was the matter myself and looked into my profiles, in one place I simply did not find it, in another it was in the category “they pay money for viewing”, and in the third the data was magically distorted, and I didn’t seem to edit it no possibility. I wrote a letter to the webmaster demanding to remove my profile, it was really taken off, but the report on site updates did not stop.

A friend helped me write an amazing letter in English, which said that I really love fishing, jazz, European cinema, more than anything else I love to cook delicious and healthy food for my loved one. In general, this is a rare nonsense … I began to send this letter in response to the questionnaires that I liked. I really liked one Swede, I wrote him a touching and lyrical letter about walks in the woods, European cinema and Scandinavian literature. The Swede replied that this is all good, but he needs my parameters: height, weight, size, and also (most mysteriously) - the area of narrowing of the pelvis. I didn't write to the Swede again, although, God knows, my dimensions are not bad, but in what units the narrowing of the pelvis is measured, I was ashamed to clarify …

This example taught me nothing, and I continued to look for Scandinavians. Dane Eric, plus all the declared positive qualities, had an excellent command of the Russian language (he taught it at the University of Copenhagen). Eric tormented me for a long time with psychological questions: what would I feel if I was locked in a white room with no windows, what clothes match my mood better during the rain or when the sun is shining, etc. and admitted that he did not intend to marry, since he has both a wife and a daughter, but if I agree to leave dreams of my own family, he will rent me an apartment in the suburbs of the capital of the Danish kingdom …

I still cannot understand why this prospect did not captivate me at that very second. Virtuality with Eric ended without becoming a reality. Nevertheless, the demand of foreigners for me was quite extensive. And everyone has the first question - whether I am married and whether I want to marry them - beautiful, rich, confident, single … All foreigners, having learned that I was divorced, very strictly demanded to inform them of the reasons for the divorce and my financial situation after it. In the very first letter, they asked me to indicate my attitude to sex, because they are such a sexual passion and they need a wife who can satisfy even the most real stallion (literal quote) … But, for some reason, for some reason none of the overseas suitors wrote about themselves: a kind and strong man who dreams of starting a family …

A favorite masterpiece in my collection of virtual grooms - a young man of 25 years old from Holland proposed to marry me: he wrote that he has a large house with a large garden, in his house there is a large living room, a large kitchen, a large bathroom and a separate toilet. He wants to marry me because Russian girls are good housewives. He also added that he now has a large selection of Russian girls and I must hurry with the decision. This is not a joke, it was a very serious letter …

Male opinion: love on the Net. For various reasons, we create a profile on a dating site. There we find a person with whom an active correspondence begins. And the longer we talk to him, the more we like him. In our view, a person becomes almost perfect. Having drawn a fictional image for ourselves, we endow it with those features that we want to see in our partner. And this is the least of the troubles. Read more…

Time passed, hopes melted … But still I could not part with my original idea - to get married abroad …

And I found, as it seemed to me, an awesome niche - our emigrants. This is the most wonderful thing that I could come up with - they can have both normal requirements and normal parameters, while it is quite understandable why they do not find anyone in their immediate environment.

Many emigrants, whose profiles were shown on domestic marriage sites, ignored my letter. The first answer I received was simply shocking: “Dear Zhenechka, thank you for the letter, but the directing department, red hair and 25 years old is too much for me, I'm looking for something simpler, but this information scares away” … Comments are unnecessary, I I’m already seriously thinking: maybe writing is a culinary college, I don’t wear makeup and I’m under 30? But there were, albeit small, but wonderful and promising answers.

For some time I supported several lines of correspondence, after two weeks the final choice was made. I fell in love with a virtual Russian German of Moscow origin. "German" was good for everyone: age, profession, external data - the man of my dreams. In addition, he was simply delighted that I have a child. He was always very keenly interested in my daughter and conveyed his greetings to her. We wrote to each other daily long letters, several times a week sat in the "watsap", and then got microphones and chatted on Skype every day for 2 hours. our thoughts and feelings, we simultaneously turned on computers and at the same time began to say goodbye. I felt him like I never felt any real man. I was in love … if he disappeared even for a couple of days, I began to get nervous, sob, sulk and drink brandy with my friend. We began to communicate with him in September, and by the end of November I was already mentally prepared for the meeting. He promised to come to Moscow for the New Year. How I waited for him. I was terribly afraid, afraid that everything would collapse and this magical feeling of closeness would be lost …

"Nemets" (his name was Alex) arrived on December 30, he had relatives in Moscow, and he stayed with them, we met with him on the same day in the evening. Alex came with one limp carnation, and when he saw me, he said: “What kind of stupid hat you have on your head? All Moscow goes to them! " I heard this instead of a greeting. For some reason, nothing embarrassed me, and I followed him to a restaurant, where I listened to two amazing stories, the first of which was what wonderful gifts he bought for my daughter and me, in which stores and how much they cost, and how much they stood here; the story performed by Alekh took on tragic notes closer to the finale: it turns out that he accidentally left a bag with gifts at the Munich airport.

The second story was about primordial Russian hospitality, and its essence boiled down to how he - Alexa - was well fed today and how he would burst if he ate even one more bite. In this connection, in an expensive restaurant (at the choice of Alexa), we drank a glass of beer and left under the ambiguous smiles of the waiters. For some reason, it seemed indecent to me after these stories to order myself at least a salad, besides, they did not ask me if I was hungry. Then for some reason we went to the cinema, probably because I had a two-person invitation to the premiere. In the subway car Alex said to me: “Yes, the other girls I met like this are not the same, it’s different with you”. I asked with a wild expression on my face: what exactly is different with me - and I heard: "Well, it's easy with them - to drink coffee, and with you we are still going to the cinema" …

After the movie, we parted on the subway, it did not occur to him that it was 12 at night, and I live outside the city … He called the next morning, and I, slightly changing the intonation of my voice, said that it was not Jane, but her sister, and that Jane did not come yesterday, that we are all very worried: where did she go? She had a meeting in the evening, and since then no one has seen her. I also asked: who is he and when was the last time he saw Jane … Alex got scared and did not call again, and I, of course, too. Then, when the shock of disappointment passed somewhat, I recalled the moments that initially embarrassed me during virtual communication - for example, the fact that he updated his profile on a dating site after admitting to me that the only purpose of his trip to Moscow was meeting with me. Then I did not pay attention to this in my stupid, like a winter hat, love, but now, analyzing everything, I realized: yes, he met here with a dozen girls, and it is really extremely wasteful for everyone to go broke for decent flowers and food in a restaurant, and to carry gifts to everyone is the height of madness. Apparently, the idea that it would be better to come without flowers at all or go to a cheaper cafe did not even occur to Alex …

I didn’t risk meeting anyone anymore, although I continue to communicate with many people online. Well, I like it - to come home and find lyrical or funny letters from all over the world in my mail, and if I am tormented by insomnia, I can also write a wonderful answer …

My husband is having a virtual romance. And not alone. They are real girls. Two of them work with him, one is from our common company ten years ago. It’s my own fault that I found out about these novels. He corresponds with them, speaks to them affectionate words, sends all sorts of programs and pictures. I talked to him. He told me that he loves only me, and that he writes to others that he loves them, misses and dreams of hugging and kissing - it's just a virtuality, that in life he doesn't meet with them … I love my husband, but now I don't know, can I believe that this is a virtual betrayal, and not real. And what does he lack in me? Read more…