"I am fat. Should I wear a bikini on the beach? "

2024 Author: James Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 14:00

Recently, the editorial office of "Cleo" received a letter from a girl who asked if she, the owner of magnificent forms, should wear an open swimsuit. We conducted a small survey on this topic and today we publish two of the most interesting answers. Who do you agree with?

"I am twenty years old. A couple of days ago I bought a cute little bikini: I am leaving to rest by the sea for the May holidays. But there is a problem. The thing is that I have, so to speak, curvy forms, even overly curvy, as some say. I'm still wondering if I should wear a bikini? Usually I wear as close as possible swimsuits (although in general I try to avoid beaches precisely because of the need to undress). My friends believe that I should not care about other people's opinions on this matter and that I should wear whatever I want if I feel comfortable and relaxed in such clothes. And I’m not sure that I’ll feel comfortable, because I’m still afraid of what people will think of me. I heard opposite opinions on this matter: some argue that bikini on fat girls is sexy, others, on the contrary, think that it looks terrible. What do you think?"

Unsure

Do not think that only girls have fears about appearing on the beach.

The man answers: "Plump can be super sexy."

Dear Uncertain! The only thing that men consider terrible is painful thinness. When you look at a person and cannot understand: is it a girl or a guy? And it's quite another thing to see a real feminine figure, with curves and bulges. I'll tell you frankly: on the beach you will meet a lot of skinny creatures who consider themselves beautiful, while men look at them with pity and thoughts like: "She would eat something."

Yes, there are guys who only like skinny ones. But, in my opinion, there are much more of those who are crazy about magnificent forms and, in general, about the most diverse types of female figures. Some like the "hourglass", others - flat-chested, the third - curvy shapes, like yours, how many people - so many ideals of female beauty, and there is not and cannot be any single standard for everyone.

The main thing is not to be led by the feeling of fear that you look "ugly" and that this cannot be changed: such thoughts paralyze, cause apathy, self-dislike. And you just need to act. Moreover, in the same way as people who are satisfied with their appearance do. They are always demanding in the choice of clothes: so that every dress, every suit, including a beach one, favorably emphasizes their dignity. Do the same. Look for outfits that you think suit you. And if you need to change something in yourself - so start changing, getting rid of unnecessary things.

And, by the way, do not think that only girls have fears about appearing on the beach. Many men feel insecure in swimming trunks or tight-fitting shorts. Someone worries that his chest is full, like a girl's, others have a "beer tummy" and since then they walk on the beaches without taking off their wide T-shirt.

What I'm actually trying to say is that plump girls can be super sexy if they understand what their attraction is to men and are no longer ashamed of their luxurious forms.

You need to get rid of suspiciousness and not think about whether the guys like your figure or not, the main thing is that you are happy with your body. And then, for sure, there will be someone for whom you will be the ideal of beauty. So right from this minute, take the first step so that he, this still unknown guy to you, was struck on the spot by your beauty and the fluids of happiness emanating from you when you meet.

Maxim, 37, Moscow

The same applies to men: no one wants to meet fat men.

The woman answers: "It is better to be critical of yourself."

I am 34 years old, I am a widow, and lately I have been in search, I am quite active on dates: I meet on dating sites, at special parties, I do not miss chances in everyday life and at work. More than 90% of my new acquaintances are looking for slender women with a sporty, fit figure. This is not only my experience, just go to any dating site and read what they write in the "who am I looking for" section. Or at least from memory, count how many familiar men prefer fatties, and how many do not. I myself weigh 63 kg, height 170, average build. I consider myself more of a curvaceous woman, since with a clothing size 44-46 I have a fourth breast size. Me and my friends, who have a similar build, do not suffer from a lack of male attention. But those who need to lose weight by 15-20 kg rarely meet with someone. Even if they do not have any complexes about their body, there is no low self-esteem and they like themselves the way they are. They are very surprised that men want to meet with me 7 times a week, but they are ignored and avoided. I will say more: many men shared with me their disappointments when they met and most often told the following story: “In the photos on the social network, she was just a miracle, but in life she turned out to be fat”. I've never heard a man say that he doesn't like skinny ones.

Yes, we can say that there is no single standard and ideal of beauty, that there is always your soul mate in the world, but in real life, based on my own experience, I argue: most men prefer women who look healthy.

That is, they love both thin and full, and with wide bones, with full hips or, on the contrary, wide shoulders, but not overweight!

I think that it is better for you, Uncertain, to look the harsh truth in the face: even if you internally tune in positively and do not have complexes about your own weight, this will not add to you fans: no matter how you cover up these excess fat with well-chosen clothes and your relaxed state - with time will only get worse.

By the way, about the feeling of happiness and self-confidence. I am a doctor, I have to deal with patients who radiate a good mood, who are younger than me, suffer from overweight, and, as a result, they have diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol levels, some cannot have children, can hardly move, and so on. … Perhaps if they were critical of themselves and instead of working on their inner state, they worked on improving their physical health, everything in their lives would be much better. And there would be even more confidence.

Who do you agree with more?

	With Maxim.
	With Alexandra.
	I have a completely different opinion on this issue.

The same applies to men: no one wants to meet fat men. By the way, women, as a rule, are more critical of their appearance, and men have an inflated opinion of themselves: most on dating sites describe themselves as slim, with an athletic physique, and in life this can mean anything: dystrophic or overweight. …

Alexandra, 34, Moscow