EXCLUSIVE CLEO: practical advice from a child psychologist

2024 Author: James Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 14:00

Your baby learns to communicate

(continued, beginning)

Earlier we talked about how a baby learns the world of objects: learns to grab them, throw them, learns about their jumping ability, smoothness, hardness, angularity and various other qualities. But what is this absurdity? Until now, we have bypassed the most significant element of the child's environment - the PEOPLE (and above all the mother).

Human babies are born so helpless that they cannot survive without an adult. "SOS! I need help!" - the general meaning of the child's first messages to this world. It is the surrounding adults who satisfy all the needs of the baby, which he notifies with his cry. We, adults, try to include the baby in a more diverse communication: we talk to him, touch him, bring other adults to him, etc.

1. Not even a month has passed and our child is already demonstrating obvious joy when a person approaches, or being in his arms: an inept smile and active curling with hands and feet - this so-called "revitalization complex" is a clear evidence that the child prefers human beings in front of other surrounding objects, recognizing it. The first smiles of the baby are reflexive, they do not relate to something or someone specific: "I feel good, I am pleased, I am satisfied" - this is what the baby "says" smiling to us for the first few months.

From the first weeks of life, as soon as the eyes have learned to coordinate their work (focus), you can hang a schematic image of a human face (point, point, comma …) on the side back of the bed, vertical and horizontal groups of lines, combinations of circles, simple geometric shapes.

Note that:

- the images should be hung at eye level of the lying child, at a distance of 20-25 cm (the baby is myopic!), - for the development of perception, black outlines on a white background will be more suitable than multi-colored drawings (contrasting combinations are more easily recognized by a baby than pink-blue pastel tones, which parents love to surround a child with), - the thickness of the lines is less than 0.3 cm, the baby will not notice at all.

A small person is constantly improving his ability to distinguish things from each other (living and inanimate, familiar and unfamiliar …) At 2 months, the baby will obviously prefer the faces of living people, but he still continues to smile at the picture. After another couple of months, the drawn face will no longer cause a smile, and by 5-6 months, the child, perhaps, will greet only familiar people with a smile.

2. There is a truly wonderful thing that can give your little one another opportunity to date a human face. Have you guessed? it MIRROR.

- While the child is not a month old, you can simply hang a small mirror over the bed.

- Then fix a larger mirror on the side back so that the baby can see his face and movements, the changing reflection in the mirror will attract the child's attention.

- With your help, at about the age of 6 months, a child can come to understand that his movements cause the image in the mirror to change, but in the first year of life he is not yet able to fully realize this.

- And, finally, at 13-15 months it will suddenly open to him that the face in the mirror is himself.

You can help your little one go through this difficult path of realizing their reflection. Sit the baby in front of the mirror and, while talking to him, turn to him, then to his reflection: "And who is sitting here? This is Vanya sitting. Here are his eyes … here is his nose … here is his mouth …". In this case, you can use the baby's pen to show on parts of the face (both your own and in reflection). Thanks to the mirror, the baby will make many important discoveries. One of the first: "This is I. I look like I am reflected in the mirror."

The child's relationship with his mirror image and with the looking glass world generally develops throughout childhood. There are literary examples of this - remember Lewis Carroll's "Alice Through the Looking Glass". In scary stories that younger students love to tell friends, the mirror often acts as a mediator between the worlds. But back to babies again …

3. So the little man responds happily to his face. But after all, the expression on the face, its various mines - this is a special language with which people communicate to others about their condition. For example, a smile - I am glad, eyebrows up - I was surprised … The child will have to master the language of facial expressions.

You can help your child in this difficult task. Play "Repeats" with him. Simple "dialogues" can be started with a baby already in the second month of his life. A child's careful gaze is a good start for this game. So … Raise your eyebrows up, as if expecting a statement from the child. The child will grimace and, for sure, will smile. Now it's your turn to answer - smile! Wait for the baby's reaction to your actions - it will be more distinct than the first. You can smile even wider or even slightly tickle the baby, causing him to have a stronger response, the child may laugh.

In this simple game (most mothers unknowingly use such games when communicating with a child), the baby learns important social interaction skills: "you said - I said - you - me …", and gets acquainted with different facial expressions.

The principle of any "repeat" game is imitation. By imitating you, the child learns imperceptibly not only to communicate, but also to learn how to use objects. As the baby grows up, you can complicate the grimaces: open your mouth wider, move your tongue, fold your lips in different ways - this will gradually train the vocal apparatus. Teaching a child to blow (blowing out air), first blowing lightly in his face - he will surely like this. Show how you do it by exhaling the air forcefully. After a year, the child will be able to blow off light objects (feathers, soap foam, paper), about 1, 5 years old - blow through a straw into the water, releasing bubbles. Similar breath games is an excellent exercise to prepare you for active speech.

4. You can interfere with the child learn to establish contacts with people around, if:

- you will be overly persistent and hasty. The nervous system of an infant is slower than that of an adult to transmit signals to the brain, so it is worth giving the child more time to respond to your actions!

- you will impose your company on the baby if he is clearly not in the mood for communication (for example, he turns away and cries). Postpone the games until a better moment.

A small child is an extremely sensitive creature. Without questions and answers, he knows exactly about the mood of the people around him. The kid is "infected" with the state of another. Psychologists call this type of emotional response empathy. You are nervous, stressed - and the child is restless. You are happy - and the baby is happy. Do not start games, overpowering yourself, trying to imitate a good mood, the baby will get through you! Let the child associate good emotions with play and communication, not anxiety.

And remember: the development of facial movements can slow down if the child does not see different expressions on your face and, of course, he has nothing to imitate.

Well, next time we will talk about how in the second year of life a child ceases to be the "Master of the World", but at the same time acquires more opportunities …

Natalia SHPIKOVA, psychologist