Forever alone: how to find the pros in loneliness

2024 Author: James Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 14:00

Are those who say that they absolutely do not need anyone, that they feel good alone with themselves, are they cunning, while others only interfere with enjoying the calm flow of life?

Of course, it is difficult for a sociable person to imagine that someone can voluntarily choose an empty apartment and not let anyone in it who would want to be around.

Read also

Psychology | 2018-14-02 Behind the feeling of loneliness on February 14

But there are such people, they see a certain charm in loneliness and deliberately do not look for friends and life partner, and if they are by themselves, they arrange a serious internal conversation, the leitmotif of which is the thought "do I need this?"

For eternal loners, the question will never arise: "How to survive loneliness?" But what should those who have become hostages of "the most clawed beast on Earth" do not of their own free will? How to find the pluses in a state that makes you want to howl like a wolf and climb the wall?

The only way out is to try to understand the philosophy of loners and feel what they feel. Let it become easier for you at least for a while, and then people will appear in life who will help make it even more beautiful.

123RF / Fabiana Ponzi

Loneliness: without a loved one

If you've just parted ways with someone who has occupied all your thoughts for the past few years, and it seems that now life will never be the same and will not bring anything that could please you, it's time to see the benefits of such a lifestyle.

At first, now you are your own mistress: the times when you had to adjust all your plans to the “I want - I don’t want” your beloved man have sunk into oblivion, now no one makes you claims about long conversations with a friend in the messenger and does not stand over your soul when you picking up an outfit for the evening.

Secondly, now you can afford some female weaknesses that were inaccessible in the presence of a man: walking around the apartment with a mask on your face, flirting with other representatives of the stronger sex, studying and applying in practice the rules of healthy eating (with husbands who like dumplings and fatty dishes are can be quite difficult).

Thirdly, now you are deprived of all the hassle that precedes the separation of most couples. Now is the best time to find harmony with yourself and the world around you. You can do yoga and meditation, for example.

123RF / melpomen

Loneliness: no friends

It so happens that due to some life circumstances not a single friend or girlfriend is nearby. And there is no one to speak out, and life seems insipid and boring. However, this loneliness has its advantages.

At first, you significantly save money. To some, such a statement may seem mercantile, but on the holidays we spend huge sums, buying gifts for our friend Vasya, friend Masha, her husband Igor, etc.

Secondly, you are freed from listening to many hours of spiritual outpourings, which sometimes get boring. No matter how good your friends are, sometimes not one of them is ready to talk to you about you.

123RF / Roman Samborskyi

Thirdly, time is freed up to work on oneself. Often we make a choice in favor of a walk with a friend, postponing, for example, English lessons indefinitely. Now you have a great opportunity for self-improvement. Don't let her go.

Loneliness: no children

When children become adults and leave to study in another city, some mothers at first do not find a place for themselves: the apartment seems empty, you do not want to go home, there is nothing to do. However, right now you have come a time that you simply must devote to yourself. It was as if you returned to your youth when you did what you wanted: read in the evening before going to bed, and did not get your daughter to school, met with your friends, and did not run like mad, home after work to feed the child, in general, paid much more time for yourself than for someone else. Enjoy.

123RF / dimaberkut

Loneliness: away from family and friends

A similar feeling is familiar just to students who left their parental home, or to those who, for some reason, left to live in another city or country. Everything around seems alien, and the absence of a loved one around makes the stay in a new place even more difficult. But even in this state, there are advantages.

You are free to do whatever you want. What was forbidden or condemned in the parental home is now in the public domain.

At first, you are free to do whatever you want. What was forbidden or condemned in the parental home is now in the public domain. Late homecoming, watching movies that you love and not the ones that most chose, bathing for many hours, etc.

Secondly, you have a great chance to miss your parents. Often, living next to loved ones, we do not have the opportunity to understand how dear they are to us. Parting in this case is good for everyone. That is why adult children, coming home on vacation or on vacation, are less and less likely to quarrel with their parents.