How can a single mom live?

2024 Author: James Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 14:00

You got divorced, or forgot to get married, or you simply did not meet your soul mate, or you never looked for her, but wanted to become a mother before such an opportunity ceases to exist. Or did you not think that where there is a man, there may be a child, and he just abandoned you. The latter situation, by the way, occurs most often. He loved you madly, carried you in his arms, but after the phrase "there are three of us," your ideal man yesterday, all of a sudden, suddenly began to do things, or utter words whose meaning is unambiguous: thank you all - everyone is free. Moreover, words and deeds are striking in fiction, fantasy and variety, but their meaning remains the same. If you want to appreciate the creativity of your man - tell him that you are pregnant. There are, of course, unprecedented men who happily or not very much dare to sing their parents' song in a duet, but this is already something from the realm of fantasy.

So, your family became maternal. And the question arises: how can a single mother live? And here you are, as it were, standing on stage, performing a parental solo, catching the sympathetic glances of friends and relatives. Now you are alone. You are on stage, and they are in the auditorium. At the same time, you must perform your solo beautifully, effectively and with dignity. To do this, you need a good melody, and here are its ingredients:

Components No. 1

The production of children is a collaborative affair, and your egg does not have to pay alone for its active sperm. In physiology, no one has yet declared matriarchy. He is responsible for the child as much as you are. So you have the right to demand alimony. And here just do not need pride. We need to fight for our rights and for the rights of the child. True, your faithful may quite unexpectedly experience partial amnesia, and he will claim that he sees you for the first time, but even here you should not get confused and quickly go to court with a claim for establishing paternity and recovering alimony. Then he will not get out. The origin of a child can be determined with the help of a forensic medical examination (gynecological, biological, genetic, etc.).

Refusal from this case would mean his paternity. So, as they say, in his hand there will be an ace, and in yours there will be a joker. Genetic examination with 100% probability can give an answer to the question - is this person the parent of the child. And if you remain a single mother as a result of a divorce, then defending the receipt of alimony is generally elementary.

Components No. 2

How else can you help a single mom live? You and your child are now a mother's family, a social unit, which means that the state should be responsible for you. In order to provide material support for motherhood, fatherhood and childhood, the Federal Law of the Russian Federation of May 19, 1995 established a unified system of state benefits for citizens with children. Benefits include: maternity benefit; a one-time allowance for women registered with a medical institution in the early stages of pregnancy; lump-sum payment for the birth of a child; monthly allowance for the period of parental leave upon reaching the age of one and a half years; monthly child support.

If I were in their place, I would have introduced an allowance for restoring the nervous system after receiving benefits, since it is extremely difficult to do this, but nevertheless it is necessary to try and fight for your rights. Although, in fact, Russia does not respect the basic principles of the Declaration of the Rights of the Child, and reality cries out about the need to protect the rights of Russian children, their mothers and families and provide them with assistance from the state, as written in the World Declaration on the Survival, Protection and Development of Children (Regulation children in the world 1991: 52-56): Article 15. All children should be given the opportunity to identify and fulfill their potential in a safe and supportive environment, with a family or caregiver that ensures their well-being. They must be prepared for a natural life in a free society …

So don't let the state forget about its responsibilities!

Components No. 3

If the child does not interact closely with both sexes, this can lead to a long series of problems, leading to difficulties in adaptation in adulthood. Moreover, the child should see in front of him not just the figure of Santa Claus. He needs a person who will communicate with him, who will show real concern for him, with whom he can argue and, as a result, expand his ideas and knowledge. Try to find a man who would embody the features of the father for the child, whether it will be the child's real father, his grandfather, uncle, friend, teacher. And the best option for you is to simply remarry.

Components No. 4

It's not easy for a lonely mom to live, you alone carry the whole load, designed for two: you wake up at 2 am to calm down a crying child, entertain him when he is bored, heal him when he is sick … even though you still need to work. In this situation, the main thing is not to forget that you are a WOMAN. Many mothers leading a solo part, fulfilling the role of father and mother at the same time, become "it". Do not forget that you need to have interests and a circle of friends besides your child. Don't forget to buy yourself a new bottle of nail polish or a tube of lipstick on the way for baby food. Think about yourself and take care of yourself. Then and only then can you turn your female and mother solo into a duet …