Papa Carlo's happiness

2024 Author: James Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 14:00

Have you ever met a person (emotionally healthy and not a prisoner) who could live without money and be happy? Imagine that you have all the necessary things, but you cannot purchase anything on your own. Every day you meet people who can buy any little thing at any moment, and you can only look at it, realizing that many years will pass before you can do the same. In this world of abundance, where everyone can find something for themselves, there is nothing for you. All your acquaintances and friends consider you to be a completely free person, and your loved ones insist that this is the happiest time in your life. Now imagine that this is how your child lives, and you will understand how important money is for him.

1. Money gives freedom of choice:

a) buy what you want at the moment (children are much more impulsive than adults);

b) buy this without asking parent or adult opinion (eating a lot of chocolate is bad, why do you need these stickers).

For the first time, a child thinks about what he needs and how to get it, what is needed first of all, and what can be delayed.

2. Money boosts self-esteem. When we give a certain amount to a child, we simultaneously make it clear that we trust him. We believe in his independence, in the fact that he can reasonably dispose of them.

3. The child learns to communicate: a child who has never had personal money can find it difficult to talk to the seller in the store, pay receipts, not because he is timid, but because he does not have enough experience in this.

4. When making purchases, the child learns to defend his interests: no seller has yet managed to convince a child to buy something that the child does not like.

Often parents do not want to give money to their children because they think:

1. children do not need them;

2. children are too gullible and naive, they will not be able to properly dispose of them.

They can make money:

a) lose;

b) give"

v) spend them on little things (key rings, gum, stickers, chips, cheap jewelry);

G) can use them the way we would not like (buy cigarettes, beer, play in slot machines);

Finally, children can be deceived.

In this case, it is better not to give money. We will protect the child from many temptations. Children will not be a godsend for scammers, they will not drink, smoke, lose money. It is better to give money only for travel to the place of study and food.

It is possible that the child:

a) refuse to eat;

b) refuses to pay for the fare, but with the money saved, he will still buy what he likes, and will feel guilty at the same time;

v) will count the pennies he found at home on the street …

He can obediently do without personal money and will face all of the above problems when he is old enough. Only to them will be added indecision, distrust of oneself and others, and in ten to fifteen years it will be the parents who will be blamed for all the troubles. Such children may well grow into people who are afraid to spend money and acquire something for themselves. These are men who honestly give their entire salary to their wife, mother, sister, housekeeper "for housekeeping", or women who do not dare to buy something for themselves. Such people do not like to go shopping alone. They are ready to choose slippers for hours, every minute asking a companion for advice, and after buying they feel guilty that it is too expensive (wrong color, size).

"Here's a gold one, buy yourself a primer"

("The Golden Key, or The Adventures of Pinocchio" by A. Tolstoy)

Money is usually given in different ways:

1. a certain amount for a certain period;

2. "payment" of money for domestic work;

3. encouragement with money for academic success, in creativity;

4. "surprises" on holidays, birthday.

Money can be given to children from the age of five. Usually a small amount (for a cake, a balloon, stickers) is given every day. Over time, both the amount and the length of time for which it is issued are increased. As a child grows up, he learns to choose not only ice cream, but also school supplies (books, CDs), then clothes and shoes.

Some people are tormented by doubts: is it worth paying money to a child to work at home, for success in school? So you can give this money with a smile on your face, and not "pay". In the end, such payments can offend: the child will really begin to feel like Cinderella in his own family. What matters is not how we give this money, but what our facial expression is. If we, smiling, encourage the child's initiative with money and happily open the wallet, I think the child will be happy, satisfied and grateful. And if we, with a stone face and solemn intonations in our voice, list for a long time what we are giving this money for, then we are unlikely to hear words of gratitude.

"Kitty, why do you need a million? What will you spend it on?"

("Twelve Chairs" I. Ilf and E. Petrov)

If we proceed from the principle that children do not know how to spend money, we will have to think about how much we are ready to "throw away". This amount usually depends on the income level of the parents and the nature of the child. While mentally composing the "consumer basket" of your child, one must remember that children often spend large sums on little things, not because they lack something, but because often children do not know how else to manage money. Little things are different. For some it is a chocolate bar, for some it is the tenth bag, for some it is a cafe, and often a child can pay for the whole gang of his acquaintances. Explain to him that once wasted money could grow into a beautiful amount, with which he could claim to buy something worthwhile. Teach everything that you know yourself, and don't worry. After all, no matter how much we would like our children to spend money the way we think it is right, they will still spend it as they see fit.