There is no place in the world for perfection, or How difficult it is to be more successful than a loved one

2024 Author: James Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 14:00

- What am I doing wrong? Well? I'm pretty, smart, I earn money … What else does he need? - more and more often I hear from my friends.

What is the answer to this? The easiest and most painful option is that he needs not"

But what if you know perfectly well how to assemble furniture, choose a computer, if you have received a technical education, occupy a top position in your company and receive a decent salary for this? Well, well, everything is a little simpler - you like an active life, you know how to communicate with people and earn at least two-thirds of his earnings. He does not allow you to buy the wine that you liked, simply because he did not take enough money, and in the company with a woman, a man must pay for everything. He sincerely does not understand that you have enough brains to choose a cell phone yourself. And any attempts to explain that you have exclusively business partnerships with men run into dead silence. And constancy in this matter is frankly exhausting the soul.

When you come home before him, your amazed gaze will most likely open a plate of sandwiches and a can of beer, and your equally amazed ears will hear: “It's good that you came, I'm already hungry. dinner? . And when you collapse exhausted on the sofa and try to talk about how insanely many things you had to redo, at best he shrugs off and continues to watch TV, and at worst begins to explain that your job is nonsense, but the last football match - a truly universal event. But all this, albeit with difficulty, can be endured. The most terrible thing becomes after you, beautiful and intelligent, talented and charming, are left.

And a week later you meet him with another, and you wonder how this could have happened, because she is clearly stupider than you, she works for one hundred and twenty dollars a month and it is good if she can compete for the title of "not the worst frog of the local swamp." And you would be happy to use the advice of psychologists who recommend finding a reason for personal growth in any parting, but you understand that here you can only fall, and most likely - below the plinth.

Of course, you can't go down to a level that would suit your loved one. And he is not an episodic figure in your life, so that you can play a comedy in front of him, pretending to be small and fragile - sooner or later you yourself will get tired of constant buffoonery. Re-educating men is a useless and meaningless task in advance, and if you look for a person worthy of yourself, you can reach the absurd remark from "Moscow Does Not Believe in Tears": "Unless a minister is caught unmarried."

And now a problem arises - I don’t want to go below my level, but "there are few princes and there are not enough of them for all." Many girls make a conscious choice - they put up with most of the "household" little things for the sake of "big and pure love", but this is very quickly exhausting, since there is a discrepancy between price and quality - you give and forgive a lot, but you get very little. There is a very real possibility for modern society to avoid communication with a man altogether, but it is not acceptable for everyone for a variety of reasons, therefore, sooner or later most women find themselves in a very unpleasant situation when they are left alone simply because they preferred a simpler and more domestic creature …And no exhortations of friends help to get rid of the feeling of deep disappointment in the structure of this world and the devaluation of their own successes. I would like to scream: "Why is this all?" - and escape to Mars, lie there under a stone and quietly hate all of humanity. Or you have to do a thousand things just to avoid being at home alone.

But still, a relationship with a person slightly less successful than you is possible. So is happiness. Of course, each case is individual, and there can be no ready-made recipes. If a man is annoyed at the sight of your successes, then this means that you pay little attention to his achievements. Most of the problems with men are often solved through listening, because they really do not like it very much when a woman talks a lot about herself, especially since the humanities and social professions, which require a lot of communication, fall under the jurisdiction of the fair sex, at that time as a non-beautiful person deals with silent mechanisms, accordingly, our habits and communication skills are very different, and this can also give rise to completely unnecessary conflict.

In my experience, the worst thing is that you can say: "I am a clever, beautiful woman, what else do you need? What do I need to do so that you would be with me?" Because the only answer that can follow is nothing. Of course, the most important thing is the desire to be with this particular person, but as the main alternative, which I have tried several times, I can recommend … find him a new job. If there is not enough knowledge, send it to study. The most important thing is to infect a person with a personal example, to try to find a new business for him. This is the only sure way. Do not go down to him, but pull him up. Not to accustom him to his own perfection, but to force him to develop. And most importantly, if he succeeds, it will only mean that you yourself are worth a lot. So the place for perfection in this world can still be found.