I don't want to go to work

2024 Author: James Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 14:00

Who is to blame and what to do?

If you go to work with joy and are ready to move mountains for the sake of your beloved boss, then you are one of those lucky women who are satisfied with their place of work. But the rest, unfortunately, go there with mixed emotions: in fear of another reprimand, with disappointment, or simply without any optimism.

What does work give us? Livelihood and the ability to self-actualize, show your abilities and talents. However, the sequence of these two components is not obvious. Another thing is obvious - in order for work to bring joy, both material interest and moral satisfaction are equally necessary. Failure of at least one of these characteristics leads to the fact that you trudge to the workplace joylessly, sit out "from ring to bell," and, in general, spend half of your life without pleasure.

What causes the crash and how to avoid it?

I don’t think it’s worth talking about the fact that a meager remuneration for a disproportionately greater physical or intellectual work will inevitably cause irritation.

Negative emotions are also guaranteed when the profession you have chosen does not meet your inner interests and needs. Here, even a quite decent salary is not able to reconcile for a long time with the need to do an unloved business from day to day.

But there are also more hidden reasons why even the work you love may not be a joy.

1. Feelings of guilt towards others

It is good if the houses are sympathetic to your dedication to your favorite work. And if not? If you constantly hear reproaches for not paying enough attention to children, to your husband, to elderly parents … You must, must, and must once again, but you want to completely devote yourself to your favorite work. What to do?

In order not to dissolve in others, it is important to understand what exactly you want. If you strive to work, then you cannot refuse it for the sake of others. Therefore, as soon as everyone encroaching on your care and attention begins to demand that you leave your job, do not rush to agree with them and do not torment yourself with remorse.

Remember: if you do not satisfy your ambitions, then you simply will not have the desire to help others. Tell your loved ones that you do not intend to discuss the issue of dismissal, and firmly adhere to your position.

2. Fatigue is not conducive to love

Sometimes work becomes a burden due to constant overload. Against the background of chronic fatigue, everything is seen and felt in a black light.

The obvious way out is to rest. But if, after leaving vacation, you again took on an unbearable burden, after a short time everything will be repeated.

How to avoid overloads? It is enough to organize your own time correctly.

The Eisenhower Principle, which is based on two criteria: importance and urgency, can help you with this.

In accordance with this principle, first of all, it is necessary to determine for yourself simultaneously important and urgent matters and to carry them out immediately.

After that, things are important, but not very urgent. You can delegate them to someone. This will allow you to reduce your own stress. If no one can cope with them, you will have to do everything yourself.

Further - matters are not very important, but urgent. Try to pass them on to someone who can handle them.

And look at the rest carefully - maybe this is all "vanity of vanities"?

3. Don't underestimate the "human factor"

One of the most common reasons for a lack of joy at work is poor relationships with a coworker, boss, or subordinate. You gladly came to the workplace until … someone appeared in the department to annoy you.

The reasons for unsuccessful relationships can be any: different characters, different points of view, misunderstandings, competition, or the desire of a colleague or boss to solve their personal problems at your expense.

All this traumatizes, keeps a person in constant tension and offends. But you must realize that finding a safe haven where everyone loves and supports each other is extremely difficult. Therefore, let's see how you can change your own behavior in order to communicate constructively with colleagues and not come home with a load of negative emotions.

The main mistake we make at work and because of which we suffer later is the substitution of personal relationships for work. We expect understanding, respect and love from colleagues. And when we don't get it, disappointment sets in.

If you notice such moods in yourself, try to urgently get rid of unnecessary expectations and remember the main purpose of your stay at work.

Make a rule for yourself: I work at work, not sort things out. Remember that your boss is not your dad, and your colleagues are not brothers and sisters. These are people who have their own interests and responsibilities. And if their interests do not coincide with yours, this is not a reason to go into deep depression or lose your job. It is better to direct the energy that goes into experiences into the working channel. In this case, you will be much less vulnerable to envious people, offenders, and “harmful” bosses.

The list of reasons why people do not feel comfortable at work goes on and on. But under all circumstances, there is one universal advice: if you have a feeling that your work is mostly negative emotions, try to look at the situation from a different point of view. Which one? Well, for example, take a look at all this more globally. Perhaps, against the background of your life goals, all problems at work will seem like just a petty mouse fuss, which is not worth worrying about and wasting time on it.

Failed? Anyway, the situation with work is oppressive and traumatic for the psyche? Then go away. And don't regret anything. In the end, recent years have brought us not only difficulties in finding a job, but also new, real opportunities to find something to do. The risk is justified, because Chekhov once correctly said: "Whoever has experienced the pleasure of creativity, for that, all other pleasures no longer exist."

When work became a wolf. Expert opinion

Denis Kuznetsov, career development specialist, businessman

“Work should be enjoyable”, “Find yourself and your vocation in your career” - these are excellent slogans, but in reality it can be tougher: you need to banal money for a living, hold out in an unloved company “until better times”. Or there is simply no suitable alternative yet.

What to do when at work: "harsh and unfair"?

• Among the heavy, boring job duties, find the 20-10-5% that inspire and develop you - and concentrate on it.
• Create a "bright career future" now. Learn new skills, take on challenging projects to impress a new employer with them in a job interview and spice up your resume. Get valuable experience that will raise your self-esteem.
• If there are few bright spots in your work, try to create an outlet for yourself in the form of a hobby, sports, or just new experiences. At least a couple of hours (or better days!) A week, do something that will give you enough inspiration and strength to withstand the hard workdays.
• Work conflicts are bad nerves and wasted time. They often arise when you do not know the true motives of a person's action. A frank conversation will help here.

But before you find out who is right or wrong, have a heart-to-heart talk about what is close and important to your colleague. Even a short “no tie” conversation on abstract topics can resolve most tensions and help you get out of tough conflicts rather quickly.