My sweet mother-in-law

2024 Author: James Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 14:00

Came home from work - uff! We must quickly grab our shoes and run to the workshop. I grab it, put the money, documents and keys in a small bag and a train of perfume is already dragging down the stairs. Soon the scent mixes with the scent of glue, rubber, and God knows what other tricky substances are used to revitalize shoes. I made it before closing time. Lucky. I finish sinking home, go to the kitchen. Dinner in a skillet is good, no need to cook. Instead, you can sit down at the computer. I sit down, looking forward to a pleasant evening. Pretty soon the doorbell rings. On the doorstep my dear mother-in-law.

Mother-in-law

- Honey, hello! Well how are you?

- Hello, Margarita Pavlovna. Good. What about you?

- And today we had so many people, you can't imagine - there is no time to dine, where there is - there is no time to even raise your head. But I bought a melon - is it really pretty? Does it smell like melon to me? Smell! - the melon pokes almost into my nose, the cloak is taken off, I am sadly wandering afterwards to the kitchen, anticipating the holiday of communication, - I also bought a little sausages so as not to spoil, (yeah, it will spoil at my husband's), - And our young husband will meet with Petya tonight ? He told me so. Do you know when? Probably after ten. Do we have dinner? Is it a cutlet? Mm.. Yes, here it is. Okay, I won't cook anything for him. Imagine, I forgot to put the meat out of the freezer. Now I can't cook in the morning. So … Milk sour, bake pancakes tomorrow morning, before work?

- Before work? - after all, the mother-in-law is a strong woman, - If you want …

- Okay, I'll call my parents.

All, interest in me is lost, thank God. I go into the room. My sweet mother-in-law followed by:

- Darling, have you seen the phone? - comes after me into the room, - well, it is charging … - it touches, as if the temperature of the device changes from the charging period - has it been lying for a long time?

- Yes, already all night and all day.

- Okay, then I'll call, - hums and dials the number, not leaving the table with the computer. Zero attention to me. I went to the computer in my room, and she seemed to be going to talk here.

- Mom, are you? Hello. Well, how are you? - her attention was attracted by pieces of paper on my desk. He takes one of them, looks at it, squinting. I am standing next to me, I don’t know what to say. Reads, puts on a pile of other papers. Then he takes the next one, one more, and another … Sorts all the lying papers. I am silent.

- Mom, well, I'll come tomorrow … Yeah … - for the first time during the conversation she looked at me. An expression as if I had asked something completely inappropriate. Turns and walks majestically out of the room. Finally, there is a lull.

I sit down at the computer. Not even half an hour passes, the door opens noisily:

- Can you imagine: she again says that we left her, that no one needs her! No, I understand, old man, even when he is ill, the mood is bad, the head is already in disorder. But this is to blame me for leaving her! - a quiet, pleasant evening at the computer … - Of course, it's hard for her, but what else can I do? So I'm doing my best and the impossible! - Comes to my travel bag with money and documents, - I can't quit my job and just sit with it!.. And what do you have? - Climbs into a bag, tries to find out everything herself, my jaw is slowly trying to reunite with the table.

- I took my shoes to repair, and in order not to carry a heavy bag, I took a bag for documents.

- Did you go to measure shoes? Well, well, well … - sugary smiling, rubbing his hands, - where? Beautiful? How much do they cost? Did your husband see?

- I took it to the workshop for repairs.

- Aaa … - attention is lost, Margarita Palna continues to look in thoughtfulness into the bag … pause.- Well, now, can you imagine? She accuses me of ingratitude! She says that she fed us, raised us, looked after us, and now she is ill, and no one goes to her, - she goes to the door, not stopping broadcasting. - It’s for me, when I’m getting out of my skin anyway, I’m spinning everywhere: I need to go to my sister, and to my parents, and I also need to do so much around the house! - this is already pronounced in another room and I have no choice but to follow her. - And I can't burst!

Begins to disassemble the shoes in the closet.

- And why do they all dump on me and do not want to help? …

Doorbell. Semyon Semyonitch. Comes in, it immediately becomes crowded.

- Girls, hello! How are you doing? - bends down to hug Margarita Palna, squeezes her, then hugs me, as if they haven't seen each other for a hundred years. It seems that he had a long day. - And I bought bread. Has anyone else bought it?

They go to the kitchen, I prefer to retire. The rattle of a key in the door. Husband.

* * *

Alarm

I slap my hand on him, he stops talking. As soon as I close my eyes, it squeaks again. What are you itching to do? We'll have to get up. I crawl out of the room. The bathroom is busy. I said the same in the evening when I get up! OK. I wander into the kitchen. The door slams, Margarita Palna floats out of the bathroom.

- Good morning, dear! Well, how did you sleep?

- Hmm, - I grumble and hurriedly jump into the bathroom. I undress, turn on the water. A knock on the door.

- Darling.. - silence.

I freeze like a wet statue and listen.

- Darling..

- Yes, Margarita Palna?

- Are you going to be pancakes, or porridge?

- Kashka - I answer in an almost inhuman voice.

I leave the bathroom and I am greeted by a tirade about the distribution of time when cooking pancakes in the morning and about the history of pancakes in their family. In order to somehow stop this, in a pause I say …

“Today I dreamed that you organized a campaign to travel to the gold mines. And there were..

- And what, it's definitely about me. I've always organized everyone. When we had a difficult financial situation, I came up with the idea of taking a home job. We did it with the whole family, it was so hard, but …

- Lord, who pulled me by the tongue. Silence would not have caused this verbal avalanche again. But I listen to the whole story, which I have already heard at least five times, to the end. I'm leaving to dress in the room.

I'm going out. She is having a breakfast. At the same time, looking into nowhere, he thoughtfully picks his nose. I raise my eyebrows in surprise as I walk past. I'm starting to be late. I try to comb my hair and apply war paint as fast as possible. She comes in.

- Do you have time for breakfast?

- I don't know, I'm in a hurry …

- What is your boss! Doesn't give food! Nightmare! And first you sing, and then you comb your hair.

I am silent. Well, yes, and I'll go to work unkempt. Better hungry.

My sweet mother-in-law stumbled a little on the spot and, not finding support, left. Of course, there is no time left for food, I run out - a new day has begun!