How to make your husband fall in love with you again

2024 Author: James Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 14:00

All fairy tales end the same way: the prince takes the princess by the hand, they go into the sunset, and on the screen appears: “They lived happily ever after. End . But you and I understand that such a happy ending is not about our reality. As a rule, everything just begins with the sunset.

But the beginning is not at all what we dream of. Bouquets of flowers give way to armfuls of dirty laundry for washing, romantic dinners - exhausting trips to the grocery, and long night conversations on the phone - his quiet "uh-huh" from the computer.

123RF / Marcos Calva Mesa

Yes, the tale is over. The "harsh" family life began. But women are not at all happy with this alignment. We dream that even with a stamp in his passport, our man would continue to seek us, give flowers, surprise us with pleasant surprises. Simply put, we want the fairy tale of the “candy-bouquet” period to continue throughout our lives. And we get very upset when our desires do not coincide with reality. Moreover, we even begin to think that we are not loved!

Why is this happening and how to become a valuable woman for him again, she said in her webinar "What to do if my husband stopped loving?" psychologist Julia Sviyash.

Does he love it or not?

Let's first understand a very important issue that will help you to take a sensible view of the current situation in the future. What do you think about when you realize that your beloved man no longer needs to win you over?

It is unlikely that you calmly argue that this is normal, that this happens to everyone and you should not panic. Most likely, you are overwhelmed with indignation mixed with fear: "He does not love me!"

123RF / Wavebreak Media Ltd

After all, I would love - I would continue to give flowers, surprise, arrange romantic dinners, say compliments, etc., right? But you understand - all this is not about love itself, but about its manifestations. Therefore, we make the first and very important conclusion - no, he did not stop loving, but he stopped showing love. And that’s what really hurts you.

Why do we need him to show love?

The most important psychological instinct of a woman is to be loved. We see meaning in life only when we feel that we are loved. We just need the admiration, sensitive care and loving behavior of our partner. Otherwise, we begin to lose ourselves, become nervous, drooping and literally demand this love, pull it out with ticks. So all these stupid questions from the category "do you love me?" They arise not because a woman is bored, but only because she needs to feel again that she is admired, admired and cannot live without her - in other words, she is “caught up” again.

Why does a man stop "catching up"?

Firstly (and this is completely normal, although not entirely pleasant), a man stops conquering a woman, because he understands that she is already “his”. There is no more need to put in the effort and prove that he is the best. She had already chosen him - what else do you need?

Secondly, a man's interest often weakens due to the fact that a woman plunges him into a state of total comfort, in which, moreover, there are almost no emotions. Yes, he is warm, tasty and comfortable, but he lacks some "peppercorn".

123RF / Andriy Popov

Remember the time when he courted you: there was much less comfort, and more emotions. But that didn’t stop him from following you with his “tail”, literally bombarding you with romantic messages and presenting you with bouquets.

Third, the fact is that women completely lose focus on themselves, obsessing over their husbands, children and household responsibilities. In fact, a woman dissolves into others, ceasing to be herself - the one that he liked so much. He looks at her and does not see more of those shining eyes, passion, desire to develop, to become better. He sees only a woman loaded with problems with a dull look, who every second thinks about everyone and everything except herself.

And finally, we ourselves make efforts to ensure that men stop conquering us. How? We start to press. At the moment when a woman realizes that a man no longer gives her the necessary portion of admiration and romanticism in a relationship, she takes everything into her own hands: resentments, tears, accusations are used. “You don’t give me flowers”, “you don’t give me compliments”, “you sit at the computer all day instead of spending time with me” …

I'm sure all these phrases are familiar to you. We begin to push in such a way that we discourage any desire to "catch up" with us. And in the end we ourselves suffer from this.

123RF / Katarzyna Białasiewicz

What to do to make it start "catching up"?

It would seem, well, where can you "run away" if you are already married? No, not to my mother or to a friend. Now we are not talking at all about slamming the door and disappearing from the house for three days, but let him get bored and understand what happiness he has lost. All this is just about the pressure and destruction of relations, and we are about creation and quality improvement.

There is only one place where you should "run away" more often - this is your interesting and mysterious world. Your hobbies, hobbies, women's secrets, communication and even work should always wait for you in it.

It sounds corny, but it is very important for you to understand one thing - yes, women cannot live without the realization that they are loved, but this does not negate the fact that a truly interesting and rich life can only be in a person who is good alone with yourself.

123RF / Felix British

You should not shift the responsibility for your happiness or unhappiness onto the shoulders of the man next to you. He, of course, can brighten up your existence, fill it with new emotions, but it is sacred to believe that only he is responsible for your sense of self is at least stupid and shortsighted.

Another important nuance - you should never forget that a man needs to feed his sense of self-importance. Only that representative of the stronger sex who knows that he is needed, is valuable, that they listen to him, recognize his superiority and trust him, only he is able to see the value of the woman who is nearby. Unfortunately, a man who has lost faith in himself is not able to "catch up" with the one that made him lose faith in himself. And all these statements from the category “you can’t do anything”, “who needs you like that”, “I don’t believe you”, “here Masha's husband gave her an expensive phone, and you can only promise what” they kill in him any desire to develop and do something, even for a beloved, but a woman who has lost its value.

You can find more specific examples of how to "run away" from a man when you are already married or are in a stable and long-term relationship in Yulia Sviyash's webinar. Listen, take a note and start living a full life in which a man is a brave hunter, and a woman is a coveted "prey". And nothing else.