Ubersexual: in search of a real man

2024 Author: James Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 14:00

Several years ago, like a bolt from the blue, a rather ambiguous appeal to the stronger sex sounded from the pages of men's gloss: fight for your "rights"! You have the right to go shopping and wear designer jeans. You have the right to spend as much time and money on self-care as you want (even if you outdid your friends in this). You have the right to read women's magazines if you are interested in them, and enjoy the fashion shows on Fashion TV all day long. You can do whatever you want because you are men and you are beautiful.

I think you know better than me how the representatives of the stronger sex reacted to this. At some point, it became simply scary, and only one question was buzzing in my head: what next? But every action is always opposed - and a new concept soon appears in the Collins dictionary - "retrosexual", and on the Internet - a manifesto in which men persuade each other to be courageous. "A retrosexual," it says, "cannot afford to be a slave to stylish rags. He hates a tie, but knows how to tie it. There is at least one suit in his wardrobe that fully reflects his masculine essence." The fashion for new words is also supported by the media, introducing the term "technosexual". This man is a slave to electronics, in which he sees true beauty and harmony. The best investment of the money earned for him is to buy a sophisticated computer in which he finds a friend, a mistress, and a wife. And then someone brings to the arena a "pomosexual" who no longer sees gender differences and denies all the labels associated with this in general - a kind of hermaphrodite. And, finally, in search of a real man, humanity returns to its origins, namely, to the normal, traditional understanding of the destiny of the stronger sex as a warrior, breadwinner and protector.

Men no longer need to dye their hair and wear tight tops, buy cosmetics in stores and go on an apple diet, because a new type is born - "ubersexual".

Waiting for the Uber

To paraphrase a well-known phrase, "nothing feminine is alien to men" - and this has been so since time immemorial. Even five thousand years ago, among the Egyptian pharaohs it was considered a special chic to wear a false beard, and among the Roman patricians - to dye their hair. The era of Peter the Great also contributed to the formation of the image of a "real" man, when sometimes much more attention was paid to camisoles and beards than to actions and political decisions. But Oscar Wilde, as you know, successfully combined care of appearance with literary activity, serving as an example to follow for followers in many countries of the world: Mikhail Kuzmin in Russia, Marcel Proust in France, Gabriele D'Annunzio in Italy. In general, metrosexuals have always been, just the words of this until the end of the 20th century, no one knew.

Likewise, an ubersexual cannot be called a product of the new millennium. Another thing is that, perhaps, thanks to the appearance of such a concept, true masculinity will again enter, as they say, into everyday life.

Who is he?

The list of the most prominent ubersexuals according to the research results of the American advertising agency JWT and their courageous actions:

1. Bono (U2) is actively helping starving children in Africa.

2. Pierce Brosnan serves his own children as a father and mother, replacing his tragically deceased wife.

3. George Clooney is famous for his ability to tame even the most obstinate women.

4. Evan McGregor lives a full life, participating in all kinds of actions in support of the sick and the needy, but not forgetting how to dress up for the red carpet.

5. Arnold Schwarzenegger is strong both physically and mentally, as he convinced even the most pessimistic people when he became Governor of California.

It is easy to guess that the word "ubersexual" finds its roots in German and Latin: über (over -) + sexus (gender). According to the authors of the book "The Future of Men", "Uber" came into our lives for a long time, which, in general, is true: the era of feminism has long faded into the background, and in the new, post-feminist era, men in the traditional sense of the word are much more in demand rather than effeminate metrosexuals.

What is he?

It is customary to recognize Uber by such attributes as expensive cognac and cigars, casually unbuttoned shirt collars under equally casually buttoned jackets, the last Esquire number in his hands and a slightly brutal scent that he prefers over floral perfume. At the same time, an ubersexual is by no means slovenly, he finds time to look after himself and his woman, to monitor his appearance and foreign policy.

They prefer practical Boss and Armani to glamorous Galliano and Gaultier, discussing fashion trends with a girlfriend - a business conversation with peers, and often more experienced people. Energy and energy - that's what is immediately felt when an ubersexual appears in the room. They want to admire, want to listen to him, behind him - to be like behind a stone wall.

In general, this image was waiting for its time for quite a long time, while women defended their rights. There have always been ubersexuals, they simply had no place in a constantly changing life. So, the main ubersexuals of the world, which are recognized as Bono (lead singer of the U2 group) and Pierce Brosnan (Bond. James Bond), have been known to the world for several decades and are even in demand in many qualities, but they are included in the category of icons only now, and this is no coincidence … They just can coexist peacefully with strong successful women, not being burdened by their successes and achievements.

The ubersexual is calm, balanced, loyal, ready to compromise. He is elegant - not brutal and not corny, but rather something in between. He goes in for sports not to show others the "cubes" on the press - he just wants to feel healthy, strong, vigorous. He does not lie on the couch when you, tired, barely dragging your feet, come home, but helps you to relax, makes you feel that you are welcome and they are waiting for you. He is able to walk the dog himself if you stay late at the meeting. He will gladly take responsibility for your child from a previous marriage and become such a father to him, about whom a son or daughter will say with admiration later: "My dad is the best in the world!"

Two of a Kind

"Here is a holiday on my street!" - you will exclaim after reading the previous paragraph. Just do not rush to rejoice ahead of time: try to start with a good look at yourself from the outside. Are you worthy to be with him? Let the ubersexual be loyal, but he will never allow himself to sit on his neck. Coexistence for an "uber" is a union of two equal people, and therefore a man close to the ideal wants to see a woman close to the ideal next to him. This means that washing - cooking - gym - beauty salon - social events are not canceled.

Femininity, grooming, thriftiness, love for children, husband (as well as his parents and friends), and at the same time charm, intelligence, intelligence, the ability to maintain a conversation in any company - all this "uber" expects from his faithful.

Agree, the task is not easy. "Okay, and mine is not bad, you think - not ideal, but at the same time not demanding …" - you will back down. But try to look at the situation from the other side - after all, you have been developing all the best qualities over the years for yourself, for the enjoyment of your own pride. So why not try now for someone who will give your life new, completely unforgettable colors?

What's next?

I would like to believe that the population of this new species of man, previously listed in the "Red Book", will constantly increase. True, the wave of metrosexuality never swept our country, and therefore there are serious concerns about the fate of the "Uber" in Russia. And then - it is not known how long this current will dominate the whole world. There is only one consolation: fashion is cyclical, and therefore real men will sooner or later return to our lives, and then there will definitely be a holiday on our street.